


Skinny Dipping in the Pool of Love

by BazineApologist



Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Sequel Trilogy
Genre: Alternate Universe - British, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Alternate Universe - Reality Show, Bazine is Anna Richardson, F/M, Happy Ending, Humor, Naked attraction, Nudity, POV Ben Solo, POV Rey (Star Wars), american ben solo, dating show, insecure Ben Solo, naked attraction au
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-02-23
Updated: 2020-04-26
Packaged: 2021-02-27 23:17:53
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 15,334
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22853821
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/BazineApologist/pseuds/BazineApologist
Summary: Ben wants to fuck up his life, so he signs up to be a contestant on a Channel 4 reality game show.Rey is trying to break her cycle of only dating broody arseholes, so she decides to find a date another way. Naked. On TV.Welcome to Naked Attraction!
Relationships: Kylo Ren/Rey, Rey/Ben Solo, Rey/Ben Solo | Kylo Ren
Comments: 117
Kudos: 388





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

  * For [slipgoingunder](https://archiveofourown.org/users/slipgoingunder/gifts).



> I'm not British, but I've watched a horrifying number of episodes of Naked Attraction. I've tried to borrow as much dialogue as possible from those authentically British, "brave, naked singletons."

Ben regretted everything. 

When he’d signed up for the show, it had seemed like the perfect “fuck you” to his former life. He’d been fresh off of quitting his high-powered finance job, disillusioned with the futures both his mentor Snoke and his family had tried to push on him, and he’d wanted to do something drastic—a scorched earth policy applied to his life. 

Appearing naked on national television had seemed like a uniquely efficient means to achieve that end. Snoke wouldn’t want anything to do with him after this. And his mom, once the news made it back to the United States, would probably insist on distancing herself. She had a re-election campaign to think about, after all.

It was exactly what Ben wanted: a chance to rebuild his life without Snoke or Leia, without the baggage of “potential” or “family legacy.” When he’d submitted his online application for the show, it had been with somewhat hysterical glee.

But now, standing naked inside his pod waiting for the show to actually start, Ben was seriously reconsidering his decision. He’d been so focused on how it would affect Snoke and his family, he’d forgotten that he was _absolutely not_ the type of person who should be doing something like this. 

He was not confident—at least, not in a way that would allow him to flaunt his naked body on T.V. Ben had been a painfully awkward teenager and, despite many hours spent in the gym and the purchase of a hairdryer, he’d never really outgrown that mindset. 

Not like the fucker in the orange pod. What was his name again? Moe? All six contestants had hung out before filming and Moe (or whatever his name was) had struck Ben as the kind of self-satisfied asshole who thought he was G-d’s gift to humanity. 

Ben _hated_ guys like Moe. 

“Welcome to Naked Attraction. The dating show that skinny-dips in the pool of love,” he heard Bazine Netal, the presenter, announce from somewhere outside his pod. _Fuck_ , he thought to himself, _they were starting_. 

He tried hard not to panic as Bazine did take after take of her introduction, explaining the show’s format. Six “brave, naked singletons,” as she called them, stood inside different colored pods while a chooser evaluated their bodies and eliminated them one by one. The last “singleton” standing would go on a date with the chooser. 

None of this was news to Ben. He’d watched the show before, late at night when he was drunk. And he’d already gone through the process of interviewing and signing release forms. But there was something different about hearing the process explained while he stood naked on a soundstage, cameras all around him. It all felt so much more real.

He’d hoped to run into his chooser, a woman named Rey, before filming began, but it hadn’t happened. Apparently, the show was strict about not letting her see the contestant’s faces before she saw their junk. Unfortunately, that also meant Ben hadn’t gotten to see _her_ face and had no idea whose affections he was actually competing for. He hoped, at least, she was pretty. 

They had asked him, during his interview, what attributes he found physically attractive in a partner. He now wondered if they’d taken that into account when assigning him as one of Rey’s potentials, or if it was only a courtesy extended to choosers. 

Not that Ben had given a particularly helpful response, anyway. He wasn’t exactly choosy. Sure, he liked a beautiful woman as much as the next guy, but he knew he had an _unusual_ face, so he usually waited for women to approach him. That hadn’t satisfied the interviewers, though. They’d continued to press him while he stood naked in front of them until, eventually, he’d just admitted he liked a nice ass. It had felt weird reducing women to body parts, but that was literally the format of the show.

Outside his pod, he heard the crew start setting up for Rey’s entrance and Ben felt his nerves ratchet up. He suddenly realized how cold it was inside his pod and how that might affect a certain appendage. Luckily, the men had all joked about the possibility of shrinkage backstage and a producer had assured them the screens were opaque enough that they could do what they needed to without anyone seeing. Ben chanced a little jiggle as he heard Rey enter. 

“So, Rey, welcome to Naked Attraction!” Bazine exclaimed. “How are you feeling?”

“Slightly nervous, but very excited!” a voice replied and Ben froze. Rey sounded _sexy_. He’d lived in London for the past six years and had heard all manner of British accents; he thought he’d developed an immunity to them. And yet…

_Calm down_ , he chastised himself. _It’s just a voice. You’re losing your shit and, for all you know, she could have a third arm growing out of her forehead!_

“What made you want to choose a date naked?” Bazine asked Rey, interrupting Ben’s self-flagellation. 

“My friend convinced me to come on,” the silky, sexy voice replied. “She said she was tired of watching me go for the same broody arseholes again and again and this could be a way for me to break that pattern. I figured why not? Could be fun to see a guy with his kit off before I learn all his dark shit,” Rey laughed. 

“And there’s the beauty of this show,” riffed Bazine. “We start where good dates end: naked. But don’t forget, before you make your selection, you’re going to have to get naked as well. How are you feeling about that?”

“If I’m honest, I’m at my most comfortable stark naked. I’ve lived alone since I was sixteen, and at some point, I just decided there was no need to wear clothes at home. My mates have to practically drag me out of my flat for a night out because I don’t like to put on a proper bra.” 

_Fuck_ , Ben thought. Listening to Rey talk about how comfortable she was in the buff was too much for Ben. He was suddenly desperate to see this woman naked. Did that make him a creep? Probably. But it was what it was.

“Are you ready to play the game, Rey?”

“Definitely ready,” Rey replied.

Ben took a wide stance and hurried to fluff up his equipment. At the same time, he tried to mentally prepare himself for what would probably be a humiliating experience.

Bazine continued: “Inside each pod is a naked man waiting just for you. Every one of them has an attribute that you have said you find physically attractive. We’re going to reveal them bit by bobbly bit. All you have to do is whittle them down from six to one based on naked attraction. Shall we start?”

“Yes please,” Rey replied. 

“Can we please reveal the bottom half of the bodies?” The front panel of Ben’s pod slowly started lifting. His heart started beating faster and faster as his ankles, then his knees, then his thighs, and, finally, his genitals were slowly revealed to Rey, Bazine, and the entire crew of Naked Attraction. He shut his eyes, willing his penis to look impressive and not embarrass him. 

On the other side of the panel, he heard Rey reacting. She oohed and awwed politely, doing her best to suppress a snicker or two.

It wasn’t great. He wasn’t sure what reaction he’d been hoping for but it was certainly something more than polite appreciation and suppressed laughter. He had to remind himself that she was seeing more than just his dick for the first time; she was seeing five others as well. Maybe the snickers weren’t about him?

“What are you thinking?” Bazine asked after a moment.

“It’s a bit weird seeing willies out of context like this. They’re like live dick pics or something,” Rey snorted in reply. “But at least I’ve solicited them.” 

“Are you drawn toward any particular color?” Bazine prompted. 

“Maybe Orange,” Rey replied, barely suppressing another snort. 

_Thank fuck_ , Ben thought, relieved to not be first. But the feeling didn’t last very long as Ben remembered which asshole was in the orange pod. His feeling of relief was replaced by a sharp stab of jealousy. _Why was he drawn to_ him _first?_

“What draws you to Orange?” Bazine asked, almost as if she were reading Ben’s mind. He listened closely to Rey’s answer.

“Well… It’s quite a bold grooming choice, don’t you think?” 

_What?_

“Certainly,” Bazine agreed. “I don’t think I’ve ever seen a landing strip on a man before.” ( _What the fuck?_ ) “Does it please you?”

Rey paused before responding. “Um… I suppose I usually go for a more natural look, but I certainly admire the confidence,” came the diplomatic reply.

“And what about the rest of it?”

“Oh, it’s a very nice dick, generally,” Rey said. “Very proportional. Not too intimidating.” 

Ben seethed. 

They said a few more things about Orange while Ben tried hard not to make a fist. He was all too aware that his hands were visible; Orange had apparently given the women a thumbs up in response to one of their questions. _Wanker_ , Ben thought, borrowing the word from his adopted countrymen. He was pretty sure he hadn’t given anyone a thumbs up since at least the age of five.

“Is there anyone else you’d like to look at?” Bazine finally asked. 

“I’m quite liking Red,” Rey replied immediately.

_Red_ , Ben thought, alarms blaring in his head. _He was Red. And she’d said she quite liked him. And now they were coming over to get a closer look. FUCK._

As they positioned themselves right in front of Ben’s pod, he caught a glimpse of Rey’s legs, clad in something skin-tight. They looked fucking amazing. Strong and toned and—

Ben felt his dick perk up in interest and he forced himself to take deep breaths, willing his manhood to calm the fuck down. The producers had warned them that if any of them got noticeably hard it would delay production. _Erect_ penises were a bridge too far, even for Naked Attraction. 

“Now that is an impressive member,” observed Bazine like she was remarking on the weather and not his dick.

“Very nice,” Rey said, sounding a little bit breathy (or maybe Ben was just projecting). “Nice form… shape… size.” 

“Is it maybe too large?”

Ben felt his shoulders tense and he shifted slightly in the pod. 

“Oh, um, I don’t think so,” Rey said, her blush somehow obvious even in her voice. Ben was blushing too. 

“Do you have experience with one that size?” 

_Hold on—_

“Um,” Rey said, suddenly sounding a bit more apprehensive than she had a moment ago. “Uh… not exactly.” 

“Some women find penises that big to be a bit uncomfortable.”

_What was happening? Was Bazine trying to fuck things up for him?_

“I… uh… I think I could handle it…”

“You like a challenge. Just remember, it may get even larger once he’s aroused. Some penises can grow as much as 50% when erect.” Bazine delivered the line with an air of authority. 

Ben heard Rey gulp. _Fuck._

Bazine continued, unmoved. “He’s circumcised. How do you feel about that?” 

Ben had been expecting this, at least. During his time in London, he had occasionally encountered women who were surprised by his circumcised penis. It was apparently much less common here than in the States. He hoped it didn’t put off Rey. 

“Oh, that doesn’t matter to me,” Rey said. Without thinking, Ben gave her his first thumbs up in 25 years. 

Rey laughed and Ben thought that it sounded like bells. He was too pleased to be embarrassed that he’d done exactly the same thing as the wanker a few pods down.

“Anything else you’d like to see?” asked Bazine. 

Rey and Bazine continued on, closely examining and critiquing the bottom half of each of the other four contestants. (Pink’s “shockingly” ginger pubes inspired some colorful commentary. And Bazine compared Blue’s genital region to a trouser snake lost in a thicket of weeds.) At one point, they even had the men turn around so Rey could get a peek at their bottoms. To Ben’s chagrin, Rey seemed particularly impressed by Orange’s _assets_. 

The whole thing was moving much slower than expected, and Ben began to suspect a lot of what they were filming would end up on the cutting room floor. He selfishly hoped all the praise for Orange’s “delicious buns” (Bazine’s words, thankfully. Not Rey’s) got cut.

Finally, “Okay Rey, based on naked attraction, you need to decide which color, at this point, you’d like to lose. It’s time…” Bazine paused dramatically, “... to make a decision.” 

This was it; Ben knew he was about to be eliminated. He was sure Bazine had convinced Rey his cock was too big—

“I’m sad to see any of them go, really. But… I think I have to say goodbye to Green.” 

Ben let out his long-held breath. 

“Why Rey?” asked Bazine.

“There’s just something about his hairy feet that put me off him,” Rey explained, sounding guilty.

“Do you have a foot fetish?” Bazine asked bluntly, like it was the most normal question in the world. Ben couldn’t help the surprised laugh that slipped out of him. He muffled it quickly. They weren’t supposed to make any sound inside their pods.

Rey gamely replied, “I don’t, no. Don’t get me wrong, there is something intriguing about a man with big feet, but that mystery is lost a bit here.”

“Ah, the mythical connection between the size of a man’s feet and the size of his equipment,” Bazine said, pausing for a long moment after delivering the line. When she continued, she’d dropped her presenter voice. “This might be a good time to insert one of our informational segments. We can cover whether or not there’s any actual correlation between foot size and penis size.”

Ben heard chatter start-up around him as they paused filming. 

“Is it false, then?” Rey asked Bazine at one point, while the crew continued to discuss possible “edutainment” segments. “There’s no connection between feet and penises?”

“No idea. They’ll call me in to do the voiceover later and I’ll just say whatever the research intern dug up on Google. Shall we continue?”

“Oh, uh, yeah, of course.”

Someone called “Action!” and Bazine again put on her presenter voice: “Okay, Rey, let’s see who you’re saying goodbye to.” 

Ben couldn’t see it, but he knew that Green’s panel was lifting. That’s what happened when someone was eliminated; they got to come out of their pod so the chooser could either affirm or regret their decision. Ben wondered which one Rey was doing.

“This is Beaumont. He’s a 30-year-old historian from Lerct,” Bazine recited. 

Ben listened as Rey and Beaumont exchanged pleasantries, followed immediately by goodbyes. Ben wracked his brain to try and remember who Beaumont was, but he’d met him so briefly and he hadn’t really made any strong impression. Ben thought he remembered a small guy with a beard, maybe?

“So, Rey.” Bazine brought everyone’s attention back to her. “One man down, five remaining. But, there’s more to reveal. It’s time for us to see the middle part of the body.” 

Ben’s panel started to rise again, stopping just below his chin. He took a few more deep breaths and tried to tamp down his nerves. It wasn’t that he was particularly insecure about his upper body—in fact, Ben was rather proud of how solid and strong he looked—but it reminded him that they were one round closer to the face reveal, and Ben was _very_ self-conscious about his face.

“Where would you like to start, Rey?” Bazine asked. 

“Red.” 

_Fuck, here we go_ , thought Ben, trying to prepare mentally for whatever Bazine and Rey would say. 

“He’s big,” Rey said, the awe in her voice catching Ben off guard. 

“You had a similar reaction last round. To his willy,” Bazine pointed out.

Rey hummed, “I guess that means he’s proportional.” 

Ben felt his cheeks flaming.

“Big is a good thing?”

“Very good,” Rey affirmed. 

“Let’s take a look at Blue,” Bazine prompted, leading Rey away much too soon for Ben’s liking. He watched her linger in front of him for an extra moment before finally following Bazine. 

“He looks like he’d be a great cuddler,” Rey observed and Ben knew immediately they were talking about Snap. He’d met the man backstage and he really did call to mind a human teddy bear. It was an energy completely foreign to the standoffish Ben, but he had to admit he preferred it to whatever Orange was giving off.  
  


“You don’t mind someone a bit more full-bodied?” 

“Not at all,” Rey replied warmly.

Ben knew how this part went. It was a show based entirely on physical appearance, but they still made an effort to be inclusive and body positive. Rey wouldn’t eliminate Snap for having a bit more pudge than the other contestants. If she wanted to eliminate him, she’d find another reason to later on. He was safe for this round.

Pink, on the other hand, wasn’t as lucky. Rey eliminated him next. 

“Rey, this is Hux, he’s a 35-year-old antiques appraiser from Arkanis. Please, come and join us Hux. How are you doing?”

“Just great, Bazine,” a tight voice replied. 

Apparently picking up on the same pique Ben heard in Hux’s voice, Bazine decided to poke the hornet’s nest. “Great? That’s a bit surprising, considering. Tell me, Hux, is Rey the type of woman you usually go for?” 

Hux didn’t mince words. “No.”

Ben felt a swell of outrage on Rey’s behalf. Thinking about the ginger prick he’d met backstage, Ben convinced himself he’d hated the man on sight. _Of course_ , he was being a petty asshat about losing.

“No?” said Bazine, feigning confusion. “Why not?” 

“I prefer women who are a bit more… womanly. Feminine,” Hux sneered. 

Ben clenched his jaw, but Rey just laughed.

“It’s no date for you, Hux,” Bazine said, dismissing him. “Thank you. See you!” After a moment: “Definitely no regrets there, surely? He didn’t like you!”

“It’s alright,” Rey affably replied. “Worked out for the best.” 

They dove right back into the game. “And then there were four,” Bazine announced with a theatrical flair. “It’s time to reveal the contestant’s faces!” 

Ben’s panel lifted all the way up and he got his first full look at Rey. It helped distract him from his unease. She was really fucking pretty. Great body. Open, expressive face. A disarmingly goofy smile. Exactly the type of woman Ben would buy a drink for—if he were the type to approach a woman in a club. Or even just the type to go to a club. Or do anything besides work or brood over a pint at his favorite pub.

It made him feel like shit. 

At least if she’d been normal-looking, he might have stood a chance. But this woman… she probably had her pick of men. Why would she want someone grumpy, overgrown, and recently unemployed, when she could have someone as charming and conventionally attractive as Mr. Orange? Or Blue? Or Yellow? 

“Take a long, hard look, Rey,” Bazine instructed. “Where do you want to go?” 

“Blue. He’s got quite a happy-looking face. Not what I usually go for, but my friend Rose tells me I need to try something new.”

Ben glanced over at Snap, who was grinning broadly in Rey’s direction. He couldn’t help glancing down at the other man’s junk and—yep!—thicket was a pretty accurate description of what Snap had going on down there.

“That’s right. You mentioned you usually go for more somber-looking fellows,” Bazine recalled.

“Yes. Hasn’t really worked out for me so far,” Rey laughed. “But there’s something about a furrowed brow and a pouty lip that I guess I’m just drawn to.”

“Someone a bit more like Red?”

J _esus Fucking Christ_ , Ben thought. _Bazine really had it out for him!_

Rey glanced up at him and their eyes met for the first time. Ben watched as a flush of color spread across her pretty face. “A bit more like Red, yeah,” she said, not breaking eye contact. 

She had freckles. 

Ben held his breath waiting for her “but”— _But not with that nose. But with a stronger jawline. But only if it came in a prettier package_ —but it never came.

“Is there anything else you notice about him?” Bazine asked.

“His hair,” Rey admitted, finally turning away to address the presenter. “I think it’s better than mine.” 

“Those really are some luscious waves.” agreed Bazine. “Would you like to run your fingers through them?”

Rey smiled mischievously. “Of course. Maybe even give them a good tug or two,” she confessed.

Ben felt a rush of blood to his dick and, panicking, tried to hide it behind his hands. It only called more attention to the situation. Rey’s eyes went wide. Bazine’s narrowed. “Let’s give him a minute to collect himself and move on to Yellow,” she suggested, expertly diffusing the situation.

“Okay,” Rey squeaked. 

While the women approached the spectacled man to Ben’s left, he tried to counteract his boner with the world’s least sexy images: Uncle Luke doing yoga, rubbing Grandma Breha’s feet, Snoke in a gold lamé bathrobe. 

Nothing was working—

“He has a great jawline. He looks a bit like a movie star, doesn’t he?”

That worked. Ben’s dick deflated as soon as he noticed Rey and Bazine had moved on from Yellow and were now standing in front of Orange. 

_Fucking Orange._

“I didn’t expect them all to be so gorgeous,” Rey told Bazine. 

_Gorgeous? Ben? Or did she mean everyone but?_

“I understand, but it _is_ time for you to make a decision. Who are you saying goodbye to?” 

Ben tensed. Here it was: the end of the line. He’d been wrong last time, but there was no way he was wrong this time. After all, he’d popped a fucking boner at her! He was a monster! He’d be lucky if all she did was send him home! He’d basically sexually harassed her!

“It’s really, really hard, but it's going to have to be… Blue.” 

_What?_

“I don’t mind a little bit of stubble, but a full beard is just not for me. I’m sorry!” Rey explained, sounding genuinely apologetic. 

“Aww. Would you like to know who Mr. Blue is?”

“Yes, please.” 

“This is Snap. He’s a 37-year-old bartender and DJ from Akiva. Snap, come say hi.” 

Snap stepped down from his pod and wrapped Rey up in a huge, naked bear hug. Ben cringed at his forwardness, but Rey didn’t seem to mind. She was laughing as he set her back on her feet. “You’re lovely. So nice to meet you” she told him, giving him one last quick hug before sending him off to the exit. 

“Okay, Rey, you’ve seen what the men look like. Now you get to hear what they sound like. Tell me, what kind of voice do you usually like?” 

“Hmm. It’s not something I’ve really thought about? I suppose I like a deeper tone.”

Ben hadn’t really thought about the role voice could play in attraction either. At least, not until he heard Rey speak. Suddenly, he understood how someone could fall for a voice. 

“Okay,” Bazine said, addressing the remaining men. “We’re going to ask each of you to answer a question, so Rey can hear your voices and make a decision. The question is: ‘What do you think is your body’s best and worst feature? Yellow, we’ll start with you.”

Everyone turned their attention to the lanky figure in the yellow pod. Ben hadn’t spoken to him backstage and didn’t know his name. Like Ben, he’d seemed standoffish and nervous. Unlike Ben, his nerves manifested in an antsy, anxious exterior. (Ben was much more the simmering-anxiety-until-it-exploded type.)

The man was also tall and thin, with a shock of golden hair on top of his head. “Oh, yes,” he began in what was possibly the poshest voice Ben had ever heard, “My best feature is that my internal systems all run with remarkable efficiency! I have received a clean bill of health at my last twelve physicals. My body’s worst feature is—oh dear—I believe it’s my eyesight. Without these corrective lenses, my eyesight is an abysmal 20/1000.”

Ben faked a cough to smother the laughter that was threatening to burst forth. Rey glanced over and caught his eyes, her own eyes sparkling with amusement. 

“Was that voice what you were expecting, Rey?” asked Bazine. 

“It wasn’t! But now that I’ve heard it, it really suits him. He sounds very clever,” she complimented.

Ben was impressed by her tact. And suspicious that all the positive things she’d said about him were similarly motivated by a desire not to offend.

While Ben spiraled, the women moved on. “What about you, Orange? What is your body’s best and worst feature?” 

A strong, confident voice replied, “My body’s best feature is a tie between this voice and this juicy booty.” Orange did a hammy turn to show everyone his butt—again—and Ben had to suppress an eye-roll. “And my body’s worst feature is…” To Ben’s surprise, the other man’s eyes flitted over to him. “... I suppose I wouldn’t mind being bigger.”

Ben’s brow furrowed in confusion. Was Orange, who Rey had said “looked a bit like a movie star,” really comparing himself to Ben? And finding _himself_ lacking? It seemed impossible. Ben’s list of physical insecurities was so long (his hulking size among them) that he was struggling to decide which one was the worst. 

“Alright Red, same question to you. What is your body’s best and worst feature?”

_Fuck it, here it goes_ , he thought, hoping he didn’t come across as neurotic as he actually was. He took a deep breath.

“My best feature is probably my arms,” he began, looking right at Rey. A draft must have blown through the studio at that exact moment because she shivered. “My worst feature is my ears.” 

“Can we see your ears?” asked Bazine, making Ben immediately regret his choice of worst feature. He hesitated, looking over at the presenter and trying to puzzle out if he could get away with saying no. He couldn’t. She was looking at him with an expectant expression on her face. Ben sighed and lifted his waves to reveal his prominent ears. 

Rey giggled and Ben quickly dropped his hair back down. “I think they’re cute,” she told Bazine, a smile lingering. 

“What did you think of his voice?”

“Deep. And American! I wasn’t expecting that!” 

“Do you like an American accent?”

“I used to fancy Keanu Reeves. He’s Canadian, but the accents are similar, so… yeah, I don’t mind an American accent.” 

“Good news for you, Mr. Red,” Bazine praised. “Alright, it’s decision time again. You get to keep two, but you’ve got to wave goodbye to one. Remember, the two you keep get to see _you_ naked. Who do you want to go with?” 

Rey grimaced, apparently distressed by the prospect of rejecting another naked hopeful. “The one I have to lose is Yellow,” she admitted.

For once, Ben wasn’t surprised.

“Why?” asked Bazine. 

“I think he’s just too posh for me!” Rey explained. “I have a bit of a dirty mouth and I just can’t imagine him keeping up.” 

“Well, Rey, this is C. He’s 33, he’s from Tattoine, and he’s a linguist and interpreter. C, I’m sorry, but it’s not a date for you.” 

C gave Rey a weird bow before stiffly retreating backstage.

“Just two men remain.” 

Ben couldn’t believe he’d made it this far. 

“Very soon you’re going to get the chance to meet them face-to-face. But not before they get the chance to see you without your clothes on.” 

Ben looked over at Orange and saw him grinning at Rey in a way that made Ben’s teeth clench. The other man looked wolfish. Hungry. Ben didn’t like it at all. Suddenly, Orange’s eyes moved over to him and, catching him staring, winked. _He winked._ What the fuck was Ben supposed to do with that? He tried his best to not look like he wanted to kill the other man and returned his attention to Rey.

“Are you excited, Rey?” 

“I am! Like I said, I’m comfortable starkers.”

“Well, off you go, then. Whip your knickers off!” 

Rey followed the path of her four eliminated contestants and headed backstage.

Ben and Orange, who’s name was apparently Poe, not Moe, were invited out of their pods to stand with Bazine. “Hello,” Bazine greeted them coolly. “Here you both are! Let just dive right in and address the elephant _trunks_ in the room: I’m assuming you’ve both done a fair bit of checking out the competition. What do you think?”

“He’s massive, isn’t he?” chimed in Poe, gesturing at Ben.

Ben awkwardly laughed, thinking this was probably the most uncomfortable moment of his life. But it was shortly bested.

“Now are you referring to his height or his willy?” questioned Bazine, causing Ben’s cheek to flame. 

“Both, actually. And wide too!” 

Ben prayed for a freak lighting accident that would put him out of his misery. 

“And what about you, Ben, what do you think of Poe?”

“Fine,” Ben said, hoping that would satisfy them, but after a few moments of silence, he realized he’d need to elaborate. He glanced over at the other man, trying hard not to stare too obviously at his dick ( _So_ that’s _what a male landing strip looked like._ ) “He’s good-looking,” Ben finally offered. 

Poe winked at Ben _again_.

“Up until now,” said Bazine, bringing their attention back to her and the show, “you’ve both only seen Rey with her clothes on. All of that is about to change.” 

Ben focused on breathing evenly, telling himself that whatever Rey looked like, he’d keep himself calm.

“Come on out, Rey.” 

Ben heard Rey’s footsteps and turned toward them.

Wow. That really was a beautiful and naked woman, confidently striding across the stage. Ben searched Rey’s face for a sign of the same discomfort or self-consciousness he’d been feeling for the last couple of hours, but he couldn’t find it anywhere. Strangely, seeing her so confident in nothing but her skin put Ben more at ease. 

“So, how do we feel about Rey’s body? Poe, why don’t you go first?”

Poe clutched at his chest, feigning a heart attack. “Am I dead? Who is this heavenly creature before me?”

“You like what you see?”

“Of course!” 

“Is there something, in particular, you’re admiring?” 

Ben was barely aware of Bazine and Poe’s continued exchange. He was too caught up in admiring Rey. A pleased little smile graced her face as Poe went on and on about her abs and arms and ass. 

“And what about you Ben?”

“Hmm?” he said, dragging his eyes away from Rey with some difficulty. 

Bazine repeated the question. “What do you think of Rey’s body?” 

“She looks perfect,” he said without hesitation. After it was out, he wondered if maybe he should be embarrassed by how sincere he sounded. His mom had always told him he was too intense. Would he scare her off?

Rey took a shaky breath and her soft smile transformed into a grin. 

“And what do you like particularly?”

“All of it,” Ben said. 

Bazine looked between them curiously before apparently deciding to just move on. “Rey, what do you like about your own body?” 

“Um, I like how strong I am. I haven’t had the easiest life, but it’s helped me to learn self-sufficiency and determination. I think my physical strength is an outward manifestation of that.” 

_Fuck._ All Ben had ever done to earn his strength was slam protein powder and spend an ungodly number of hours at the gym. 

“Is there anything you don’t like?” asked Bazine.

Rey’s serious expression turned playful. “I wouldn’t say no to bigger boobs,” she joked. 

Ben couldn’t help taking another look at Rey’s chest, searching for her supposed flaw. He didn’t see it. If fact, he liked her tits. Sure, they were small, but anything more than a handful was a waste. At least, that’s what he told himself, consciously ignoring how happy he’d been with an old girlfriend’s double-Ds. 

“Well Rey, it’s time for you to make your final decision. Poe or Ben?”

“Oh no! This is so hard!” Rey cried, the conflict clear on her face. 

Ben started preparing himself for the inevitable rejection. If Rey was at all conflicted, Poe would obviously win.

“They’re both so lovely, but in such different ways! I think…” ( _Here it came._ ) “... I think I need to ask myself ‘what would Rose do?’ She’s the one who pushed me to come on the show, she’s the one who told me I need to break my pattern. So I think I have to choose… ”

Thick tension filled the air. 

“… Poe!”


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rey's POV: The aftermath of her choice.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm pretty sure I told someone in the comments, this chapter would be posted 2+ weeks ago. I'M VERY SORRY. Also, it's three chapters now. 
> 
> I had an actual British person read this over before posting. Still... I'm almost certain I’ve exceeded my acceptable allowance of British slang. DRAG ME, BRITISH REYLOS.

Rey regretted everything.

She was sitting at the bar of Jones’ Family Kitchen, nursing a cocktail, watching as the crew of Naked Attraction shot Poe’s entrance for the third time.

“This time, give us a little smile as you walk around the corner. Yes, just like that… Got it! Okay, next up, we’ll shoot you guys meeting for the first time with your clothes on. Rey, are you ready?”

Rey looked up from her drink and gave the producer, a man named Enric Pryde, a strained smile. “Yep,” she said, popping the “p”. “Is there anything specific you want me to do or say?”

Pryde gave her an odd look. “Be natural,” he said like it was the most obvious thing in the world. “It’s like any other first date. Pretend we’re not even here.” 

Rey rolled her eyes as she turned back to her drink. How was she supposed to pretend they weren’t there when they kept interrupting to reshoot entrances or get more coverage shots? She’d already been sitting there for forty-five minutes and her date hadn’t even properly begun. Once it did, she could hardly imagine acting naturally with two or three cameras shoved into her face.

“Okay Rey, Poe’s coming over now. Give it a moment, and then turn around and greet him,” Pryde said, motioning to the cameramen to begin shooting. 

Dutifully, Rey waited a few seconds and then turned around and smiled. Poe grinned back and for a moment Rey wondered if maybe this date wouldn’t be so bad, after all. 

“You look really smart,” she told him, taking in his now-clothed form. He was wearing a linen suit over an open collar, his trouser legs short enough to show off several inches of sockless ankle. A pair of tasseled loafers and a pocket square finished the look.

Suddenly, Rey felt horribly underdressed in her H&M top and skinny jeans. 

“Likewise,” Poe gallantly lied, putting her at ease as he leaned in for a double cheek kiss. “Nice to see you again.” 

“You too. How are you?”

“Very well, thank you.” 

With the pleasantries out of the way, Poe took the seat beside Rey. 

_Maybe this will be alright_ , Rey thought to herself as she watched Poe order a drink. She really had liked him during yesterday’s filming. Of course, they hadn’t spoken beyond a couple of on-camera exchanges, but he was fit! And even inside the pod, he’d managed to come across as cheeky and charming. He’d certainly had much more natural charisma than her other finalist. 

And yet, Rey had spent the previous night tossing and turning in her hotel bed (paid courtesy of Naked Attraction) wondering if maybe she’d made the wrong choice. For some reason, she hadn’t been able to stop thinking about the other finalist, Ben. The gutted look on his face when she’d said Poe’s name instead of his… The way his naked body had felt against hers when she’d hugged him goodbye… The deep rumble of his voice when he’d told her “Nice to meet you. Good luck with everything…” 

_The way his massive knob had swung between his thighs as he walked offstage._

But now, sitting with Poe on their contractual date, Rey felt… fine. Poe seemed great. And Rose would be thrilled with her choice. He was exactly the type of guy she was always trying to steer Rey toward.

“So,” Poe began, once he had his drink in hand. “How’d you end up on Naked Attraction?” 

___

  
  


_They were a few pints in when Finn started talking about work._

_“She just dropped out! Can you believe that? We’re filming next weekend! She kept saying her mum would be disappointed!”_

_Rey, Rey’s best mate Finn, and Finn’s girlfriend Rose had gone out to the pub to cheer up Rey after her latest breakup. (Did it count as a breakup if he just started fucking someone else?) They’d spent the first round taking the piss out of her ex, but the relationship had been short-lived and they’d soon moved on to more interesting topics. Finn’s job as a casting assistant for Studio Lambert, one of Britain’s leading makers of trashy reality television, was the current one. Apparently, one of his Naked Attraction participants had changed her mind last minute about appearing on the show._

_“Isn’t that something she should have thought about before she agreed to be on?” Rose asked, munching on a crisp._

_“Yes! Exactly! It’s not even like we approached her! She_ applied _!” Finn cried. “And, of course, since I’m the one that brought her in, the gaping hole in our filming schedule is now my fault.”_

_“What’re you gonna do?”_

_“We’ll have to recast—and quickly. Maybe we can convince someone filming a week or two later to come in early, but that creates a whole new set of problems. We cast the contestants based on attributes the specific chooser says they find physically attractive. There’s no way we’ll be able to reschedule all the contestants, so whoever comes in will just have to settle for whoever we’ve already lined up. And then, of course, the people we picked for them will be on someone else’s episode.”_

_“Fuck,” Rey commiserated. “Couldn’t you just find someone new to fill the spot? Instead of rearranging the people you already have?”_

_“Who are we gonna find in a week?”_

_“Well, what kind of person do you need?” Rose asked, sounding as if she were genuinely trying to solve Finn’s problem. Rey didn’t understand how. None of them had much of a social circle outside of their little trio. Rose had her sister, Paige. But Paige was a lesbian._

_“The contestants are all men interested in women. And they’re a bit older—in their 30s instead of our usual 20-somethings—because the woman that dropped out was in her 30s. So, really, any woman willing to choose between six thirty-something men.”_

_Paige was out then._

_“Hmm…” Rey could practically see the wheels turning in Rose’s mind. “What about Rey?”_

_“Me!?” exclaimed Rey._

_“REY??” cried Finn with such a high degree of incredulity that Rey couldn’t help but feel a bit miffed._

_“Think about it! She’s single, she got a great body, she’s not shy about nudity, and to top it all off she doesn’t have any parents to disappoint! She’s the ideal candidate!”_

_“You can’t honestly think I’m that desperate!” an outraged Rey cried._

_Rose offered her a kind smile. (If it had come from anyone else, Rey would have called it patronizing.) “Not desperate, luv. But you have to admit you’ve got shit taste in men. You’ve basically been dating the same sad tosser over and over for as long as I’ve known you. Maybe it’s time for a change? Why not try picking a man for a reason other than he seems broken and you want to fix him?”_

_Rey opened her mouth to object, but she closed it again a second later. Rose might have had a point. Rey definitely had a type: “sadboys”—men who turned their ennui into an aesthetic, who used their vulnerability and emotional turmoil to get women like Rey into their beds. And dating exclusively sadboys really hadn’t been working out for Rey._

_For the last five years, she’d been getting her heart stomped by arseholes who spent all their time playing FIFA, drinking Stella, and listening to Yung Lean. And every time it happened, Finn and Rose would take her out for a pint and listen sympathetically as she called her latest ex every rude word in her vast vocabulary. Then, three to six months later, they would do it all over again._

_Hell, they were literally out that night so Rey could drown her heartache in several pints of cider. Something had to change. But was going on Naked Attraction really the answer?_

_Finn had been silent for a while, apparently mulling over Rose’s suggestion because he suddenly pronounced, “She’s right, Rey. You’re perfect.”_

_Rey’s mouth fell open._ Well, he’d certainly changed his tune, _she thought, remembering his earlier incredulity_.

_“Honestly, I think we have a couple lads lined up who you’d really get on with. More importantly, we wouldn’t have to change our filming schedule! What’s the rest of your week look like? We’ll need to figure out a time for you to film your intro package.”_

_“My intro package?” Rey balked._

_“Your course schedule is pretty light on Mondays and Wednesdays, right? Phas will probably want you to come in for an interview. Don’t worry; it would just be a formality. It’s not like we can afford to be picky. We’re sort of gasping here.”_

_He pulled out his phone and started tapping away at something. “In the meantime, she’ll want to see some photos. Maybe something that shows off your body?”_

_“Oh, what about the pictures from that weekend trip to Brighton?” suggested Rose before Rey could object. “She was in a bikini practically the whole time!”_

_“Brilliant!” Finn beamed at his girlfriend._

_“Hold on!” Rey insisted. “I haven’t agreed to anything yet! Do you honestly think the men who sign up for a naked dating show will be better than the men I normally date?”_

_“Yes,” Finn and Rose said in unison._

_Rey squeaked in protest. “My last boyfriend was getting a Master of Philosophy! He was fluent in Latin!”_

_“So? Qualifications aren’t a measure of quality. You know that. And anyway, we get tons of students applying. The men you date are universally wankers. I wouldn’t cast any of them for Naked Attraction._ Maybe _Tattoo Fixers,” Finn said. “Maybe.”_

_“Think of it this way,” Rose jumped in. “The men who go on Naked Attraction are confident. Adventurous. Willing to put themselves out there. When’s the last time you had a boyfriend who was willing to do anything besides brood, whine about his dissertation, and smoke a ciggy in the garden?”_

_That was… true._

_“And an older man would be so great for you. Finally, someone who eats their dinner off a plate, instead of a frozen pizza box.”_

_“Teedo was older! He was a postdoc!”_

_“Teedo smelled like rollies and canned spaghetti hoops. There’s no way he owned a dish.”_

_“I…” Maybe they had a point. She’d once seen Teedo scavenge a frisbee from a rubbish pile, only to later eat a ready-meal off it. Obviously, her usual method of dating (standing around a house party until someone with sad eyes and a perma-frown offered her a drink) wasn’t working, so maybe she should consider Naked Attraction?_

_It wasn’t the most enlightened way to pick a partner, but it might be fun._

_“Please Rey?” Finn begged. “I don’t want to push you into anything, but you’d be doing me a massive favor!”_

_That’s all it took. Finn was the closest thing Rey had ever had to family. If he needed her to be starkers on the telly, she would be starkers on the telly . She’d do anything for him._

___

  
  


“A couple of my friends convinced me to come on,” Rey said, answering Poe’s question about how she’d ended up on Naked Attraction. She didn’t think he needed to know her best mate worked for the show or that she was filling a last-minute vacancy as a favor to him.

“Ace!” he said, conveniently skipping any follow-up questions. “Someone from the show DMed me on Instagram. I’d never even seen if before, but I was really intrigued by the whole social experiment angle.”

Rey laughed before she realized Poe wasn’t making a joke. “Oh, er, social experiment?”

“You know, people think it’s all about sensationalism but really it’s about celebrating the body. Delving into body language. Stripping people back to their most honest, vulnerable states and then seeing straight through to their souls. It was the philosophical aspect that really drew me in. A dating show where picking a partner is based solely on natural beauty? It’s really novel.” 

“Um…” _Was Poe a nutter?_ _She knew the show liked to peddle a lot of pseudoscience bullshit, but she didn’t think anyone actually believed them._ “That’s an interesting perspective,” she said. “It’s just, um, have you watched the show? You mention natural beauty but what about the hour spent in hair and makeup? The tattoos? Piercings? Surgical enhancements? What about your landing strip? Is any of that actually ‘natural’?”

Contrary to Rey’s expectations, Poe didn’t get defensive. He seemed to be genuinely evaluating her challenge. “I hadn’t considered—”

Pryde cut in. “Sorry to interrupt,” he said, sounding anything but. “This is great stuff. Really nice chemistry between you two. Unfortunately, none of this is usable. Our viewers aren’t interested in pulling back the curtain on production. Maybe you could talk about something else. Your first impressions of each other, for example. Rey, maybe you could talk about what drew you to Poe. Maybe how you think this date is going?”

Poe nodded, happy to play along with production, but Rey could only sigh. She’d almost managed to feel like she was on a normal date—if a bit of an unconventional one. But, of course, production had to ruin it. 

“Rey?” Pryde prompted. “Is that all right?”

“Yep,” Rey replied, her jaw tight. 

“Brilliant,” Pryde said, retreating back a bit. “Remember, we’re not even here.” 

An awkward silence descended over the date as they both tried to think of something to say that fit within production’s tight strictures. “I think I’m more nervous now than I ever was getting naked yesterday,” Rey confessed, desperate to fill the void. 

“Really?” Poe asked, leaning toward her. “Well, if you need to get naked again to feel better, I certainly won’t stop you.” 

Rey laughed, grateful to Poe for turning the mood light. “I would, but I can’t afford the penalty notice for being disorderly,” she bantered. 

“Do you think it would help if I whipped my kit off too?”

“I really don’t,” Rey laughed again. “But the two of us getting nicked would probably make for great television.”

“You know, we could always go back to one of our hotel rooms… No chance of a Bobby spoiling our fun there.” 

Rey choked on her drink. Was he having a laugh? Or had he seriously just propositioned her? Poe was smirking, but whether it was from amusement or anticipation, she didn’t know. She quickly shifted her gaze. “You really aren’t nervous?” she asked, choosing to ignore his suggestion. 

Poe shrugged. If he was bothered by her deflection, he didn’t let it show. “It was much worse yesterday. I’m proper confident, but when I stepped out of that pod and saw the cock—er, bloke I was competing against?” He whistled. “I wouldn’t have blamed you for giving me the brush-off. I might have done the same if I were in your shoes.”

Rey fidgeted. Poe’s mention of Ben immediately cast her mind back to her restless night and the hours she’d spent twisting herself up over the massive American. Eventually, desperate for sleep, she’d had no choice but to _relieve some tension_.

Her cheeks burned at the memory.

She hadn’t _intended_ to touch herself to thoughts of Ben. In fact, she’d made it a point to imagine someone else. Someone faceless. Unfortunately, by the time she’d finished herself off, the faceless man had come to bear a striking resemblance to the man in the red pod.

_Bloody fucking hell! What had Rey been thinking of saying goodbye to him?_

“I’ve seen a fair few willies in my life. Many of them up close and personal. And I can tell you, that one was really something…”

_Wait, was Poe still talking about Ben’s cock?_

She needed to change the subject. As interesting as she found this topic (and with last night’s shame still hot on her cheeks, it was clear she found it _very_ interesting), she didn’t want to dwell on her missed opportunity. She’d selected Poe! Poe had seemed like the ideal combination of confidence, cheekiness, and natural charisma. Ben, on the other hand… well, he’d borne all the tell-tale signs of being a slightly aged-up sadboy. 

Rey’s immediate, overwhelming attraction to him had been the principal indication of that status.

“... and it was circumcised! Imagine how big it would have been if it hadn’t gotten the snip!” 

Poe paused to take a breath and Rey quickly cut in. “I’ve really enjoyed this,” she said, mainly to distract him from any more monologuing about Ben’s dangly bits but also because it was true. Despite some rough bumps, Rey was enjoying Poe’s company. She just didn’t fancy him.

“Yeah?” he replied, breaking into a grin. “Me too. I think we get on really well.” 

“We do,” Rey agreed, trying to think of the most diplomatic way to add her caveat of “as friends.” She hedged a bit. “You’re based in London, right?”

“Yeah, I was born and raised in Yavin, but I’ve lived in D’Qar for the last few years. For work.” 

“Seriously?” An idea was taking root in Rey’s mind. “Have you ever been to Maz’s Tavern?” she asked.

“Loads!”

“It’s my best mate Finn’s favorite pub! We’re there at least twice a week. You should come out with us sometime.” He perked up, prompting Rey to add rather pointedly. “We’ll make it a group thing.”

There was a tense moment as Poe seemed to consider Rey’s words. Finally, he cracked an easy smile and said, “Yeah, okay. That could be nice.” Rey let out a relieved sigh. She got the impression he’d understood that she was letting him down gently and he wasn’t too put out about it. Probably because he was gorgeous and would have no trouble finding other, more willing partners. Hell, she’d swear one of the cameramen was giving him fuck me eyes already.

“I’m serious about meeting up,” she assured him, not wanting him to think her invitation was empty. “I really think you’d get on with my mates, and I know they’ll like you. Especially Rose. I honestly think she might’ve killed me if I’d picked anyone but you.” 

“Even—” Poe held his hands up in front of him, indicating something of large size. 

“Especially him,” Rey revealed.

“Blimey! Now I have to meet her,” he said. (He really did seem to be taking Rey’s rejection in stride.) “What does she have against a hefty John Thomas?”

Rey exaggerated an eye roll. “Not everything is about cocks, you knob.”

Poe laughed. “Was there a man attached? I’ll be honest, the cock is all I remember.”

_Not Rey_. She remembered all sorts of things. His dark locks, perfect for burying her fingers in... His smattering of beauty marks… His broad chest… His fully, pouty lips, just right for nipping and tugging...

“Alright, fine,” Poe said, knocking Rey out of her reverie. “I’ll save it for this Rose person. In the meantime, let’s you and I get to know each other. I have a question. And I’m warning you, it’s quite soul-bearing. Your answer _will_ determine the future of this relationship.” Rey tensed. “If you were a sandwich, what would you be?” 

Rey snorted. “Easy. A chip butty.”

Poe nodded in approval. “You know, I can see it. I’m deffo a bacon sandwich.” 

“Brown sauce or red?”

“Tommy K! How is that even a question?”

“If you’d said brown, I would’ve walked out.” 

“And I would have fucking deserved it!” he exclaimed.

They laughed and continued chatting for a bit longer until Pryde finally told them it was time to wrap up and move on to the post-date confessionals. Rey was surprised by how quickly the time had gone. By then end, the conversation between her and Poe had flowed so freely, she could have easily kept on for another hour or two. 

Rey and Poe parted with a hug and the promise to meet up again soon. But as she watched Poe walk away (strictly for the cameras; he had to come right back to film his confessional), she couldn’t help but think of another goodbye. One she hadn’t been able to stop thinking about for the past twenty-four hours.

_It was going to be another restless night._

___

_“What if you just left your phone open when you went to the loo?”_

It had been a week since Rey filmed her Naked Attraction episode and Rey, Finn, Rose, _and Poe_ were sitting around a table at Maz’s, drinking and chatting.

Rey had been right about Poe getting on with her two closest mates. She’d introduced them an hour ago and already Finn and Poe were winding each other like they were old friends. Rose’s reaction had been more restrained, but Rey could tell she liked him too. She had even entertained his ridiculous question about what kind of sandwich she’d be (a ploughmans; Finn had said he was a BLT, but Rey secretly thought he was more of a tuna mayo) and offered him half her crisps.

To Rey’s horror, they’d then moved on to discussing her cursed romantic life. Poe made good on his promise to interrogate Rose about her expectations for Rey’s future fellow (and to determine exactly how Ben fell short of them), and that had prompted Rose to catalogue all the terrible men Rey had dated since meeting Rose in her first year of uni.

When Rose finally finished her catalogue, Poe joked, “I’m chuffed not to be your type, Rey.” 

Rey made a face at him.

“You’re chuffed, but I’m devastated,” Rose interjected. “I just want Rey to finally date someone worthy of her.” 

“I’m flattered that you think I’m worthy,” Poe only half-joked, “But if Naked Attraction has taught us anything, it’s that you can’t ignore instinct or chemistry. Rey and I get on as friends, but she doesn’t fancy me.”

“You’re objectively very handsome,” Rey assured him.

“But alas,” he sighed dramatically. “My objective beauty was not enough to woo you. Perhaps you should have gone with the man you most wanted to shag.” Poe winked at her.

“What are you talking about?” Rose demanded. “There was someone you wanted to shag?”

“I wouldn’t put it quite like that,” Rey said defensively. “But I suppose I saw some potential in both of my final two. When it came down to it, I asked myself what would you do, and you would have chosen Poe.” 

“Me? Why wouldn’t I have liked the other finalist?” 

“He just came off a bit… gloomy,” Rey explained

“He did have a certain brooding quality,” Poe agreed. 

Rey watched an amalgam of emotions cross Rose’s face. “But you liked him,” she finally stated. “Of course you did. He was sad,” she sighed. “And you _still_ like him.”

“What? No! We barely exchanged two words! Maybe he piqued my interest a bit during filming, but I’ve barely thought about him since!” Rey lied through her teeth. 

“You’re blushing!” Poe cried.

“I’m not!”

“He’s right, Rey,” Finn smirked. “You’re proper red!”

Rey touched her cheeks. “I’m probably just flushed from the drink!” she insisted

“The cider?” Finn laughed.

“Did she tell you he has a massive cock?” Poe asked, ignoring Rey and her paltry excuses.

“WHAT?” Rose yelped.

Rey was definitely blushing now. 

“Being honest, mate,” Finn confessed, “it’s all anyone could talk about after his casting.” 

“You never mentioned that!” Rose exclaimed.

“What was I supposed to say? ‘Hey babe, Rey is about to get an extra big eyeful. Thought you’d like to know.’” 

Rey couldn’t help the giggle that bubbled up in her throat. 

“It’s not like I was _in_ the interview,” Finn explained further. “So I can’t say firsthand. I can only say the whole office was buzzing about it afterward.” 

“Well, I still would have appreciated some warning,” Rose pouted. “I would like to have known what I was sending Rey into! How big are we talking exactly?”

“Massive,” Poe supplied.

Now it was Rose’s turn to flush. “I suppose I’ll see for myself once the episode airs. And Poe’s and Rey’s bits to boot! All will soon be bared,” she quipped. 

Rey supposed the prospect of Rose and a million others seeing her in the nuddy should have been disconcerting, but if that were the case, she wouldn’t have agreed to go on the show. Rose watching her interact with Ben, however, was another thing entirely! The woman had an eagle eye, and she was especially adept at reading Rey. What would Rose see in the interaction? Rey wasn’t sure she was ready to expose herself in that way.

“What are you going to do, Rey?” Poe asked once Rose had gotten her flush under control and Finn had stopped teasing her about it. 

“About what?” Rey asked absentmindedly. 

“About your crush,” Poe replied.

Rey squeaked. “I don’t have a crush!” 

All three of her friends looked on in disbelief. Rey took a sip of her pint.

“Have you tried reaching out on social media?” Rose prompted, apparently coming to terms in the last ninety seconds with Rey’s continued fascination with sadboys (sadmen?). 

“Why would I do that?” Rey hedged.

“Come off it, Rey! We know you fancy him!” Finn cried, full of tough love for his closest friend.

Rey sighed. “I couldn’t find him,” she admitted. 

“What do you mean?” 

“I’ve looked! In fact, I’ve spent hours combing Facebook, Twitter, and Instagram in the last week. It's like he doesn’t exist.” 

“Wow,” Poe, possessor of 65k Instagram followers, replied. Rose just furrowed her brow in consternation. Finn, on the other hand, seemed to be avoiding Rey’s eye.

_Why was that?_

“Wait,” Rey said, realization suddenly dawning on her. “You work for the show. You know how to get in touch with Ben.”

Rose and Poe both turned to Finn expectantly.

There was a long pause. “It’s not that I don’t want to help you,” Finn began and Rey felt heart drop. “I want to! You know I’d do almost anything for you! But there are contracts involved. Just like you and Poe, Ben signed a contract with Studio Lambert where we agreed not to share his personal information with any third-party. So as much as I want to help you, I absolutely can’t! If I did, I’d be sacked! And probably sued!” 

“What if you just left your phone open when you went to the loo or something?” Poe asked. “That’s not you sharing personal information. That’s you forgetting to lock your phone. “

“They’d sack me for that too,” Finn countered. “That’s me mismanaging contestant information.” 

“No one would have to know,” Rey assured him. “I certainly wouldn’t rat you out.” 

“Alright, but what happens when you email him and he says, ‘How did you get this email? I only gave this email to Naked Attraction’?” asked Finn.

“Do you really think he’d be bothered if I reached out?” Rey asked, her voice suddenly small. She’d been so busy trying and failing to convince herself she didn’t fancy Ben, she’d forgot to consider whether or not Ben fancied her. 

“Well… you did reject him, Rey,” Rose said in her gentlest voice. “He might have hard feelings.”

Finn gave her a sad smile. “He might not mind. You are you, after all. But, on the other hand, he might. How would you feel if I gave your information out to another contestant? One of the blokes you eliminated in an earlier round? Would you be happy to hear from him?”

Rey thought of Beaumont with his hairy feet or Hux with his sneering smile. The thought of either one reaching out post-show prompted her to frown. It would be so awkward! 

“I see your point,” a deflated Rey admitted.

“No!” Poe said emphatically. Rey’s eyes went wide. The ever-present smirk was gone from his face and it was replaced with a serious expression. “I saw the way he looked at you when you walked on stage completely starkers. He was _captivated_. Trust me, you were looking proper lush and his eyes hardly strayed from your face. It’s only been a week since then. There’s no way he’s over it. He’d count himself lucky to see you again. I’m sure of it.”

He continued to hold her gaze, unflinching.

Rey’s wide eyes slowly softened and a sad little smile crossed over her face. “Thank you, Poe. But I still don’t have any way to get in contact with him.” 

“We’ll figure out something, Rey!” Rose exclaimed, apparently moved by Poe’s speech. 

“And I’ll see what I can do,” added Finn with equal enthusiasm. “Maybe the show will let me reach out on your behalf, see what kind of interest there is on his end. I could probably sell it to them as a twist ending.” 

Rey felt a swell of gratitude rise up in her chest. She might not’ve had much luck in love, but she’d been immensely fortunate with her friends. “Let’s get another round, then,” she said grinning at them all. “This one’s mine, of course.” 

Suddenly, Rey felt light. Maybe it was the cider. Or maybe it was hope.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Poe's sandwich question was inspired by reality tv icon and under-14 table tennis champion of Essex, Amy Childs. On a recent episode of Channel 4's Celebs Go Dating (my other favorite show), Amy was advised by her dating coaches to ask more questions. "If you were a sandwich, what would you be?" is Amy's inspired application of this advice. (NOTE: This was the ONLY question she prepared.)
> 
> Poe's identification with a bacon sandwich was inspired by Made in Chelsea's Georgia Toffolo, who once described the ideal bacon sandwich (a food to which she was briefly addicted) as "white bread, Tommy K, bacon, job done. Not toasted!" If you prefer your bacon sandwiches with brown sauce (what even is brown sauce??), please take it up with her.


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ben AND Rey POV: A reunion in real life and then on the show.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Once again, I had actual British person, [SituationNormal](https://twitter.com/sitdoodles), look over this before I posted, but... I may have snuck in a few more penis-related Britishisms when she wasn't looking. 
> 
> Thanks again to SituationNormal, Naked Attraction, Celebs Go Dating, and Would I Lie to You for existing and teaching me so much vocabulary.

Ben was used to getting up early. 

After all, the London Stock Exchange opened at 8 a.m., and Snoke had always expected Ben to be in the office well before the opening bell. 

But just because Ben was used to something, didn’t mean he was happy about it. And he was definitely _not_ happy about standing behind a till at 6 a.m. in an ill-fitting white button-up and red baseball cap selling coffee and pastries to the same type of sad fucks he used to send to get _him_ coffee.

But that had been before. Before he’d walked out of First Order Management in a blaze of glory and burned bridges. Before Snoke had had him blacklisted at every hedge fund, investment bank, and private equity firm in the City of London. Before he’d gotten so bored sitting around his flat, watching his bank balance decline, that he’d taken the only job Snoke hadn’t managed (or, more likely, hadn’t bothered) to block him from: Team Member at Pret A Manger.

At approximately £9 per hour, however, things still weren’t looking great for Ben’s bank account. He probably only had another month or two before he’d have to swallow his pride and tap into his trust fund.

_So much for making my own way in the world_ , he thought with a sigh. At least he didn’t have to worry about deportation. He’d gotten his settlement status while still working at First Order, so he was now free to waste his fancy Oxbridge degrees at any “unskilled” jobs he liked.

“Er, Ben?”

Ben looked down to see his Team Leader, Mitaka, timidly trying to get his attention. “Just wanted to remind you about the Pret Behaviors. Pret Team Members are happy and positive at all times to give our customers the best possible experience. It’s an integral part of our brand.”

Ben stared blankly. “You don’t think I’m happy and positive?” he deadpanned after an uncomfortably long silence.

“Er, uhh…” Mitaka was trembling. “I would never presume—It’s just that, um, just now you had kind of a distant, grim look and… It wasn’t a big deal, of course, but… well, if our corporate mystery shopper had seen it, I’m not sure he would be as keen.” 

Ben plastered a toothy grin on his face. “Better?” he asked through his teeth.

Mitaka took a quick step back. “Maybe you could, um, tone it down a bit? Something warm, but a bit less… aggressive?” Ben adjusted his face slightly. “We’ll work on it,” Mikaka said just before fleeing to the safe embrace of the black-shirted baristas across the store.

Ben dropped the smile as soon as Mitaka’s back was turned and tried to form his face into something less deranged. He didn’t actually want to scare off customers the way he’d scared off his Team Leader. He needed this job. Not for the money, per se, but because he needed the distraction; too much time spent in his own head wasn’t good for Ben. And just because Mitaka was too afraid to fire him, didn’t mean the higher-ups would be.

Unfortunately, even with his job on the line, genuine happiness was too great an ask for Ben. Instead, he tried to think about what a happy person might do. Maybe if he copied enough of their behaviors, he’d be able to convince his managers that he properly embodied the Pret culture. _”Use personal phrases that you are comfortable with and treat customers as if they are guests in your own home,”_ he recalled from the training manual.

“Good morning,” Ben tried when the next customer approached. “Nice weather, isn’t it?” 

“Well, for now at any rate,” sniffed the old woman in front of him. “They say it will be tipping down by lunchtime.” 

Ben immediately regretted his attempt at cheery small talk. He was, ostensibly, a native-English speaker, but he’d never successfully managed a weather conversation with a Brit. It seemed like such an innocuous topic, yet he always managed to say the wrong thing. Or to run out of things to say entirely. How many ways could you talk about the rain? If you were British, apparently hundreds.

He forced himself to smile and handed the woman her change. “My weather app isn’t predicting rain until Wednesday,” he tried to reassure her. It didn’t work. The woman looked offended by his contradiction and a frosty silence ensued while she pocketed her change and scurried out of the shop.

He didn’t have a chance to dwell on the failed interaction, however, because they were suddenly very busy. The morning commuter rush had arrived. In fact, it was another couple of hours before Ben had enough downtime to overthink. And by that point, the weather conversation was long-forgotten. Instead, Ben took the opportunity to poke at a much more familiar point of pain: his rejection during last week’s taping of Naked Attraction. 

It hadn’t been a surprise, exactly. Every elimination round Ben had felt sure he’d be the one asked to leave. But he hadn’t expected to feel so disappointed when it finally did happen. Probably because he hadn’t expected to like Rey as much as he did.

He thought back to his exit interview. 

_“Of course I’m disappointed,” a naked Ben had told the camera. “She’s beautiful and I wanted the chance to get to know her better. But I’m not surprised. She said Orange looked like a movie star. Of course, she was gonna pick him. Do I regret the experience? Yeah,” he’d ruefully confessed. “Because now I know what I’m missing out on.”_

Ben had signed up for the show as part of a self-destructive tear. He knew, once the episode aired, that it would negatively impact his career prospects and relationship with his family, but he’d done it anyway. Hell, for Ben, the fallout had been most of the appeal. But he hadn’t been prepared for how it would ruin him personally. Something about Rey had worked itself under his skin and he hadn’t been able to stop thinking about her. It was a lot. Too much. He was afraid he’d developed an unhealthy fixation. 

_That smile! Those freckles! That voice!_ he thought, scrubbing a hand over his face. 

At some point, his fixation must have turned into a full-blown hallucination without him noticing because suddenly Ben was sure he could hear Rey’s voice. Actually, physically hear it.

“50p for one banana!?!” it cried. 

_What a weird phrase for his mind to conjure..._

“They’ve got to be kidding! I can get them five for a quid on special at Tesco,” she continued, her voice clear as day. 

Ben’s head jerked up.

_Fuck._

He was pretty sure she hadn’t noticed him yet, too busy complaining to her friend about price gouging and produce, but it was only a matter of time. She was in his queue. He suddenly had the overwhelming urge to run. 

_What if she didn’t recognize him? Or worse, what if she was dating that fucker in the orange pod?_

Ben looked around for Mitaka, his brain screaming at him to feign an emergency so he wouldn’t have to face her, but the Team Leader seemed to be avoiding his eye. Ben had no choice but to continue working. The customer in front of Rey walked up to the till and ordered a coffee and a croissant.

“Just don’t buy a banana,” Ben heard Rey’s friend say as he was fishing the croissant out of the pastry case. 

“I _won’t_ buy a banana,” Rey affirmed. “But it’s the principle of the thing! Someone else _will_ buy a banana and they’ll have been taken advantage of.”

Ben couldn’t help but smile. Now that he was making just above the living wage, he agreed it was fucking dumb to spend 50p on one banana. (Nevermind that he kept “forgetting” to cancel his laundry service, despite having a combo washer/dryer right in his flat… The dryer didn’t work well! His socks always came out damp!) But bananas were Pret’s best-selling item. _A lot_ of dumbfucks were “being taken advantage of,” as Rey had so charitably put it.

“Here’s your croissant,” Ben muttered to the middle-aged man standing just ahead of Rey in line. He must have also been eavesdropping on her conversation because he was sheepishly placing a banana back in its basket.

“Sorry. What was that?” the man replied, glancing up once the banana was returned. “I didn’t hear you. Please, speak up!” 

Ben barely suppressed his scowl. “Here is your croissant,” he repeated again, only slightly louder but with each word carefully enunciated.

“American, eh?” the man asked, his voice at a volume that was sure to draw attention. Ben clenched his jaw. “What brought you across the pond?”

“Work,” Ben gruffed, shutting down any further conversation. The man looked affronted as he handed over his payment. “I thought you lot were supposed to be friendly,” he bit back sharply.

Ben wasn’t sure if he meant Americans or Pret employees, but either way, he knew he wasn’t being a very good representative. “Sorry,” he offered as he ran the man’s card. He handed it back with the warmest, “Have a nice day,” he could muster. The man just gave him a pitying look.

As soon as the man was out of the queue, Ben shifted his attention back to Rey. He wasn’t sure what he’d been expecting, but it was still a shock to see her looking back at him, her hazel eyes wide and her mouth adorably gaping. “Ben?” she cried.

_Well, at least she remembered him._

“Did you just call him Ben?” yelped the woman beside Rey. “As in _the_ Ben?” 

Ben furrowed his brow. The _Ben? What the hell did that mean? And why was Rey staring at him like that? Like she couldn’t believe it was really him?_

Rey was ignoring her friend in favor of continuing to hold his gaze, the hint of a smile playing at the corner of her mouth. Eventually, though, her friend’s exclamation seemed to register. After a beat too long, Rey pulled her eyes away from him to glare at the other woman. “Rose!” she scolded, a significant look passing between them. 

Ben did not find it comforting. 

Rose (Ben assumed that was her name) was grinning. “It’s very nice to meet you, Ben,” she said, turning to face him. “I’ve heard a lot about you.”

Ben frowned. “Oh, um, okay,” he said, unsure how else to respond. _Why would Rose have heard_ anything _about him, let alone a lot? Had Rey talked about_ all _of her contestants? Or was there something about Ben, in particular, that warranted mention?_

His dumbo ears came straight to mind and Ben felt his face getting hot. “Um, what can I get for you two?” he asked, suddenly desperate for this transaction to end so he could take his rest break.

“Two filter coffees in our own mugs, please,” Rey said with a smile that made Ben’s insides go funny. “They’re 49p, right?”

“Yes,” he replied, trying his best to sound professional. “I just need to see your cups—”

“And your contact information,” Rose added.

“Rose!” Rey squeaked. _(Fuck, she was cute when she got worked up.)_

“My… contact information?” a bewildered Ben repeated, looking between Rey and Rose. 

“Forget it,” Rey told him, blushing furiously. 

“I’m quite serious!” Rose insisted, getting up on her tiptoes to lean over the glass counter separating her from Ben. “Rey’s spent ages trying to contact you, but you don’t have any socials!” 

_What? Rey had been trying to contact him? Why?_ He glanced over at the woman in question and saw her nervously chewing her lip.

Ben struggled to reconcile this suddenly tentative version of Rey with the confident, self-assured woman he’d met at the taping. _Was it him? Did seeing him again make her uncomfortable?_ he wondered. _But if that were the case, why would she have spent so much time trying to get in touch with him (at least according to her friend)?_

Rather than vocalize any of these questions, Ben just told her, “Uh, yeah. I don’t have any social media. I don’t like being so—” he grasped around for the right word. “Available,” he finally said.

“I figured,” Rey replied, seeming to deflate a bit. “We’ll just take those coffees, then, and bugger off.” 

Ben hurried to correct himself. “I’m not talking about you!” he cried with a bit too much intensity. “I wouldn’t mind being available to you! It’s everyone else I’m trying to avoid!” 

Rey’s eyes went wide and Ben cringed at how awkward he was. He’d been in such a hurry to fix the hurt look on her face, that he’d gone ahead and made himself sound like a creep. Not that it wasn’t more or less true—but it wasn’t the type of thing he should be confessing to a woman he’d only met once before and who’d already explicitly rejected him.

But Rey’s initial surprise quickly transformed into the exact smile Ben had been obsessing over for several days. “Alright,” she said. “Then I’ll take your mobile number in addition to the coffees.”

Ben’s heart gave a hopeful little tug, but he tried to temper his expectations. _What if Rey wanted his number for completely innocent reasons? Maybe she was planning a trip to the States and wanted to ask him about driving on the right side of the street. He didn’t want to assume anything._

“Oh. Um. Sure,” he said, looking down at his till so he wouldn’t have to meet her eye. “But, uh, what for?”

“Well, I was hoping to sell your information to one of those tele-scammers. Make a few quid,” Rey teased. Ben didn’t react. “I’m joking,” she clarified, before taking a deep breath. “I was hoping to get to know you, Ben. Whatsapp you, ring you, maybe even make plans to meet up.” 

“What about Moe?”

There was a long pause. “Do you mean Poe?” she finally asked, sounding bewildered. Ben kept looking at his till but offered Rey a tiny nod. “Er, well, it turns out Poe and I get on better as friends. There was no spark on our date. You and I, on the other hand… Well, I haven’t been able to stop thinking about you. And definitely _not_ in a friendly way.”

Ben looked up. “Really?” he asked, hardly believing her words. 

“Really,” she answered, her cheeks flushed with pink. “I know we don’t really know each other, and maybe I’m coming on too strong, but—”

“I haven’t been able to stop thinking about you, either,” Ben confessed all at once. 

Rey grinned and Ben couldn’t help but smile back. There was something about Rey that drew him in like a moth to a flame. When he was with her, he was oblivious to everything else around him. Until—

“Thank you for addressing our concerns about your banana pricing!” Rose was suddenly loudly proclaiming. It startled Ben. To be honest, he’d kind of forgotten she was there. “I was ready to boycott your shop and tell my large social network to do the same! But you’ve convinced me otherwise. What a valuable employee you are!” 

_Had she just lost her fucking mind?_

Ben looked to Rey for guidance on what to do, but she didn’t seem concerned about her friend. Instead, she was surreptitiously trying to direct Ben’s attention behind him.

_Oh!_ Suddenly, Rose’s outburst made a lot more sense. 

Ben casually glanced over his shoulder, only to find Mitaka standing close by, watching them. When he noticed Ben looking, he offered an encouraging smile and said, “Brilliant, Ben! I was wondering what was taking so long, but now I see you were just providing the high-level of customer service Pret is so known for!” He took a step closer and lowered his voice so Rey and Rose couldn’t hear. “Do try and remember, though, our goal of service within 60 seconds. I realize this is a special circumstance. And you’ve done the right thing, but… just keep it in mind.” He returned to his regular volume, “Carry on!” 

Ben, Rey, and Rose all watched as Mitaka stepped away to micromanage another corner of the shop. As soon as he was out of earshot, Ben turned to Rose. “Thank you,” he said, genuinely. 

“I couldn’t let you get in trouble,” Rose responded. “What if you took it out on Rey and decided not to give her your number? She’d never stop whinging!” 

Rey rolled her eyes. “Please don’t listen to her,” she said. “But we really shouldn’t keep you any longer.” She glanced around and seemed relieved to find the shop mostly empty and the queue behind Ben’s till non-existent. (The lunch rush was still an hour away.) 

Rey handed him a quid. Their fingers touched briefly as Ben took the coin, and he felt something spark between them. Neither one seemed willing to break the contact until Rose very pointedly cleared her throat. Ben felt his ears go red as he pulled away to ring them up. He had no idea how long he’d been standing there, gazing at her and barely touching her hand. He seemed to lose track of time whenever Rey was around. 

Right before handing back her change, he scribbled his number onto the receipt. Rey pocketed it, along with her 2p. “I’ll be in touch,” she whispered with a conspiratorial smile. Then, much louder, “Thanks again for being so helpful! We’ll certainly be back. And we’ll tell our friends, as well!” 

“Have a nice day!” Ben told her, for once not having to fake any warmth. 

He watched as they exited (trying very hard not to ogle Rey’s ass). Just as the door was closing behind them, he thought he heard Rose say, “Poe was right. He’s smitten!”

Ben was too busy blushing to worry over the mention of Poe.

___

A couple of weeks later, Rey sat on a very uncomfortable tufted leather sofa on the set of Naked Attraction, waiting for filming to begin. She hoped the interview would be short. Not only did she not want to sit on this sofa for long, but she was eager to finish her last contractual obligation to Studio Lambert. After this, Rey would be free—well, at least until the episode aired and friends, neighbours, and strangers alike all saw her naughty bits.

“Action,” Pryde called, and Ben stepped into the frame. He leaned down to give Rey a quick hug. She squeezed back and tried her best to look like she hadn't spent the last fourteen-odd nights in his bed.

“How’s it going?” Ben asked, taking the seat beside her. 

Rey gave him an amused look. “Oh, very well,” she told him, play-acting a reunion for the sake of the cameras. Pryde had told them not to seem too familiar—at least not right away. They needed to keep the viewers in suspense. ( _Had they seen each other since filming? Were they together? Had they gotten naked again?_ ) In truth, since that day in Pret, Rey and Ben had hardly spent any time apart.

Rey turned to face the camera, ready to end the charade. “So we should probably explain something…” she began. 

Ben huffed out a laugh. 

“This isn’t Poe, who I picked and who would normally be here for this interview. This is Ben, who I eliminated.” Ben reached out and enveloped one of her hands in his. “Poe and I went on our date but we decided we were better off as mates. We’ve actually met up several times since then, but always just as friends.” She looked at Ben. “He’s a cracking mate, wouldn’t you say?”

Ben looked back, his face carefully blank. “Yeah, he’s fine,” he tepidly offered. 

Rey laughed. She knew Ben wasn’t particularly fond of Poe but she kept hoping he would change his mind—especially since she quite liked the other bloke. He was cheeky and could get them into all the best clubs and lounges. Rey may have been more of a pub-person than a club-person, but it didn’t hurt to have well-connected friends. 

Not to mention Poe was the one who’d convinced her to pursue Ben… Although, she hadn’t quite gotten around to telling Ben that. 

Fortunately, Ben was much more favourably disposed towards Finn and Rose. They hadn’t hit it off with him quite as quickly as they had with Poe, but they’d made progress. At the very least, Finn and Rose both seemed to like Ben better than any of her past boyfriends.

Rose still had some reservations about Ben’s “brooding quality,” but that didn’t matter to Rey. She was well-practiced at ignoring Rose’s opinion of her romantic life. The one time she’d prioritised Rose’s feelings over her own, she’d ended up rejecting Ben. It was only thanks to their fortuitous trip to Pret A Manger that she’d been able to correct that mistake. 

Rey looked back at the camera. “A week or so after the show, I randomly ran into Ben. Turns out, we’d both been doing a fair bit of thinking about the other. We exchanged contact info, got to talking, and we ended up meeting up.” 

Rey smiled, thinking of that first date. They’d just gone for a pint, but the banter had flowed so easily and the chemistry had been so electric she’d know quite early where the date would end up.

____

  
  


_“I could see you all fondling yourselves.”_

_“What?!”_

_“The pods are backlit. I could see you all in silhouette, jiggling yourselves around.”_

_“No! The producer promised us the screens were completely opaque!”_

_Rey could barely speak for laughing. "Definitely not," she wheezed, watching the brick shithouse of a man across from her turn bright pink. (It was adorable.) "Oh, come off it! You of all people shouldn't be embarrassed by_ that _."_

_Somehow Ben turned even pinker. "Because I made a much bigger fool of myself later on when I got, um, excited in front of you, Bazine, and the entire crew?" he asked sheepishly._

_Another laugh exploded out of Rey. She'd honestly forgotten about that, but remembering it now caused her to shift in her seat. "No," she insisted, uncrossing and recrossing her legs beneath the table. "Because your equipment is more than adequate. Much more, in fact."_

_Ben continued to blush, but at least he looked pleased._

_"Oh. Well, I'm glad you think so," he said._

_They settled into a comfortable silence, occasionally offering the other a shy smile over the top of their pint glass._

_“This has been really nice,” Rey offered after finishing off her cider. “I’m really enjoying myself.”_

_“Me too,” Ben replied, leaning across the table to get closer to her._

_Rey mirrored the move. “Oh yeah?” she teased. “Is it because of me or your lager?”_

_“What do you think?” he asked._

_“Me?” she guessed with a grin._

_Instead of answering, Ben closed the gap between them and pressed his lips against hers. Rey eagerly returned the kiss. As they were still in the middle of a crowded pub and kissing across a table, they were forced to keep things fairly PG, but Rey could feel herself getting excited._

_When they finally broke apart Rey was grinning. Even Ben looked uncharacteristically happy. “This has been such a good night,” she told him. He nodded, his heavy-lidded gaze still lingering on her lips. “I don’t want it to end,” she admitted, placing her hand on his arm._

_Ben glanced down at her hand and then up to meet her eyes. “We could have one more drink at my place if you’d like,” he hedged._

_Rey’s grin grew even wider. She felt lightheaded and giddy, but it wasn't from the alcohol. “I’d like that, yeah,” she coyly replied._

_As soon as she said it, Ben nearly went arse over tit trying to rush out of the pub. Rey followed close behind._

_They made it back to his flat at a record-breaking pace, both buzzing with excitement to get on with the evening._

_But when they reached his door, Ben paused. He looked Rey in the eye and asked her seriously, “Are you sure you want to come in?”_

_“It’s just a drink, Ben,” she laughed._

_He gave her an almost predatory once-over, and Rey felt a shiver run up her spine. “We both know that’s not true,” he said._

_She took her time replying. Not because she had any doubts about what she was about to do, but because she wanted to tease out the moment. With every beat of silence, Ben looked more and more feral, like he could barely hold himself back from ravishing her. She loved it. So she let the pause linger, letting him think she was still considering and building his anticipation up to a fever pitch. Finally, she leaned in and whispered, “I want to come in.”_

_They stumbled inside Ben’s flat in a flurry of kissing and touching and groping. The pretense of “one last drink" immediately forgotten._

_Rey thought Ben was leading them toward his bedroom, but she was too busy kissing and undressing him to get any real sense of her surroundings. She imagined them moving through the flat, tossing clothing behind them like a trail of breadcrumbs leading back to the front door. Even that simple thought was pushed from her mind, however, as soon as Ben managed to unhook her bra, tossing it aside and wrapping his pillowy lips around her bare tit. ___

____

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_"Oh, God," she moaned, falling back onto something soft. (His bed, she assumed.)_

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_"Fuck, Rey," she heard him reverently whisper. She opened her eyes to see him looming above in nothing but his pants, his eyes raking over every inch of her now-naked form. She reached up and helped him shuck off the last bit of his kit, eager to see his much-talked-about todger in the flesh once again._

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_It was even bigger than she remembered._

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_Rey scurried into position, too keen to feel intimidated by his size. That was until she tried actually impaling herself on his instrument of mischief._

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_“Bloody fucking hell,” she moaned as she clenched around him, his plonker only halfway buried in her fanny._

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_Ben was groaning, his grip tight on her hips. “Rey—FUCK—you’re so tight!”_

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_“I think you’re just fucking massive, mate!” she countered, before burying her face in his pillow to smother her cries._

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_It took some patience and perseverance, but they finally got it all the way in, Ben politely giving Rey several moments to adjust. Rey, though, was practically salivating. She needed to know if he was as good at wielding his pork sword as she’d been imagining… She started pushing back against him, forcing him to move._

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_Ben groaned and started thrusting against her._

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_He was somehow even better than she been imagining!_

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_“Oh, yes! Oh, God! Oh, Ben!” she cried out, as he rammed her with his purple parsnip, over and over again. She couldn’t believe that she’d almost missed out on this! If she hadn’t run out of tea that morning… if Rose hadn’t suggested a stop at Pret… if Pret hadn't offered 49p filter coffees with your own reusable cup, allowing perma-skint Rey to justify the extravagance… if Ben hadn’t been on shift…_

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_She squeezed her eyes shut, trying to banish the what-ifs from her mind. She focused instead on the feeling of Ben pressed up against her, shagging her brains out._

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_When she opened her eyes and looked back at him, he smiled and leaned down to kiss her. Rey had been close before, but kissing Ben while feeling him inside her was enough to bring her off and push her over the edge. Another couple of thrust and she was throwing back her head, screaming out his name._

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_It didn’t take long for Ben to follow._

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_Afterward, as they were lying in bed, both of them trying to catch their breaths, all Rey could think about was how glad she was that she’d gone on Naked Attraction._

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_She didn’t regret anything._

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_And neither did Ben._

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____

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“We’ve been seeing quite a bit of each other,” Rey told the camera, letting the double entendre sit out there for a minute. 

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“Yeah, we have,” he agreed with a knowing smirk .

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“It’s been really good.” 

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“Cute,” he offered. 

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“Cute,” she laughed. “That’s a word for it. We’re cute. And I don’t think either one of us is seeing anyone else.” She gave Ben a questioning look.

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“I’m not,” he assured her. 

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“I’m not either.” _Where would she find the time? They spent all their free time together_

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“I don’t want to.” 

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“No, neither do I.” 

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“So, I guess… that makes you my girlfriend?” 

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Rey felt her cheeks go pink and her heart jump up into her throat. She gawked at Ben for a minute, before finally remembering where they were. She turned to the camera. “We haven’t talked about this at all!” she told it like it was her confidant. 

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“We’re talking about it now,” Ben said, never taking his eyes off Rey. 

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“I…” Rey took a moment to gather her thoughts. She’d been in a lot of relationships over the last five years, each one more disappointing than the last. Ben hadn’t been in any. But here he was propositioning her on the telly for all to see.

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And here _she_ was excited at the prospect of finally getting it right. 

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She grinned goofily at him. “Of course I’m your girlfriend,” she said as if there had never been any question. 

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Ben’s face lifted in that way it only ever did for her and he stooped down to kiss her squarely on the lips. Rey kissed him back a few times. When they finally pulled apart, she looked back at the camera. 

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“This is my boyfriend, Ben.”

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**Author's Note:**

> Next up is Rey's POV, and the introduction of Finn and Rose.


End file.
